I picked up Andrew and Owen as usual from Kindercare yesterday afternoon. When we were all buckled into the car, I announced that we needed to go to the gas station before we went home. I've learned that with Andrew is it best not to spring unexpected events on him and ensure he knows why we won't be making our usual left turn out of the parking lot. Its times like these, when I remember that Andrew is three and needs time to process things that I feel like I'm making progress as a mom.
And about a nano second after I tell Andrew that we're going to the gas station I hear:
"I DON"T WANT TO GO TO THE GAS STATION!" WAIL! CRY! TEARS!
and this makes NO SENSE TO ME AT ALL!
Why is going to the gas station so bad? Didn't I give you enough notice?!?! Have you been traumatized some how by a recent visit to a gas station? What!?
Its times like these that I realize Andrew will always keep me on my toes and a little off balance. It keeps things interesting around here.
After I spent a few moments explaining to Andrew that the gas station is mandatory and the car will not go unless we have gas, Andrew chokes back a sob and asks "can I help?" and I say "of course you can help!" His tantrum ended just unexpectedly as it started. Andrew helped pump gas yesterday for the first time. After he was very proud and a happy camper. Lesson learned here: if you can't beat 'em, join 'em. Start enlisting Andrew's help.
Andrew has been full of tantrums lately. Eric and I feel that all we did on the weekend was yell and send Andrew to a time out. The most frustrating thing is that the tantrums are more frequent and are more difficult to predict. I trust that this is just another phase though and we will emerge to back to equilibrium in a couple of weeks or so. If we survived last December we can get through this.
With the bad there is lots of good. He continues to show much interest in reading and spelling. He has moments of great big brother behavior. Lots of sharing (with lots of "don't touch that Owen!". Lots of invitations to play: "Owen come over here". This morning in the shower he was very concerned about Owen's whereabouts (he was still asleep in his crib).
Andrew started gymnastics the week before last. He was terrified when we arrived and did not want to participate at all. We were on our way out to try again next week when his good friend Maverick arrived. Maverick's mom took Andrew's hand and led him to class and Andrew was just fine. By the end of the class Maverick and Andrew needed to be separated because they were having a little too much fun together. Lesson learned here: Andrew needed peer support to trust that gymnastics was safe and fun. We may use this approach to get him back into swimming lessons.
You've read about the boys activity level in my last post on Owen. Andrew needs to run around a lot these days. I'm happy to oblige, there are a lot worse places to be on a weekday afternoon than at the park with your two favorite kids.
2 comments:
Andrew looks like an old pro at gassing up your car. He is getting tall!
Oh great you've opened a new door. I see window washing and vacuuming out the car. What about picking up trash/organizing junk in the car..Oh car washing...it's in his blood, finding an item in the store. Lots of language skills are built and you get things done at the same time. Also maybe a small allowance/points tied into those little tantrums would work. You'll need to try lots of things before you're done. Oh..explanations are good, but not always needed.....think about that.....Sometimes it goes like this...in this family everyone helps. Love, Grandma Peters
Post a Comment